6 posts from June 2008

After reading the first chapter of The Reluctant Disciplinarian, by Gary Rubenstein, I already knew that I had a lot in common with the author; we both felt that teaching to traditional standards would make learning boring!  And what's the point of trying to make learning fun if things weren't shaken up a bit.  Well, he has definitely changed my mind. The book is a great read, and definitely a must-read for all first year teachers.  I really appreciated the way the book showed the author's progression into becoming a better teacher.  

For the high school Biology class of Holly Springs' summer school, I have the most intelligent 2nd and 3rd year advisors.  Both teachers have different methods of teaching, which work well for their own personalities; but, they also have the best tips for helping us develop our own teaching styles.  Both teachers allowed us to see how important it is to establish order initially, and how to do so, without losing the respect of the students.  They also showed us how to employ an effective awards system (which we are utilizing throughout the summer), so that we can have a starting point on employing a similar award system in the Fall.

Oh shoot!  I need to get up and get dressed for my school interview.  I get dressed and run out the door, go back and grab my phone, and go back out the door.  

I awakened slightly anxious that particular morning.  I knew why, but tried not to let my restlessness keep me from feeling more sick.  After all, I was just getting my first formal assessment.  I grabbed my bag and coffee as I rushed out the door.  I didn't get assessed until fourth period, so I had time to make sure that I was prepared.  I spent the first three hours running my lesson through my head.  I have to, at least, start off okay.  

Coming from the Mississippi Delta (Greenwood), reading books such as "Delta Autumn" and actively participating in discussions on race-relations/ dialogue (or the lack thereof) in the South causes an unnerving anxiety for me.  It is an odd feeling, almost like you're having an out-of-body experience where you're watching yourself react totally different from the way you normally would (or know you should).  Four years ago, I could talk about race, insects (which I am now deathly afraid of), and explicity describe how to disect any small animal over dinner without missing a bite!  Now, I just lose my appetite.  In many ways, I feel I had begun to adopt the very ways of thinking that have been so notorious in creating the South that we all know and love to hate.  It is so much easier to ignore a problem; it just depends on how easy you can fool yourself into believing it's not really a problem.  It is so much easier to lose hope.  It's sad, but it's true.  

Reading "Delta Autumn", I discovered the beginnings of a re-awakening of a few good ole' feelings: I felt hope again, and I had some faith in part of the educational system- which is good, coming from none at all.  I appreciated how Mr. Wilkens and Dr. Mullins took the time to explain the emergence of Mississippi's past educational systems, in addition to those presently being implemented. Unfortunately, the current schools in place for special needs areas in Misssissippi are very similar to those established after Plessy v. Ferguson.  We've come so far to be at a standstill.  It's sad, but it's true.

But that's where we come in.  We have a lot of work to do as teachers and there is hope!  That hope lies with us and our ability to the influence our kids.  While de-brainwashing them of over half a decade's time of degradation passed from generation to generation seems impossible, all it takes is a little change to make way for greater change.  While it may take just as long to demolish these thoughts as it took to put them there, it is a war that we should never feel wary of.  Amid the inevitable craziness to come with the next weeks and upcoming schoolyear, we must always have a good, persistent structure, just as detailed as those presented by "Autumn" itself.  We are required to show strength, perserverance, and hope, even if/when we lack them.  And last but not least, we have to T-E-A-C-H. So, once the schoolyear starts, I can't wait to start showing off all the skills I've learned and tips I've retrieved from this detail oriented book.  My kids are going to hate me today, but they are going to love their futures tomorrow.  And that's nothing to be sad about. :) 

To be honest, my first week has been a pretty rough transition for me.  There are a lot of factors that cause me to feel this way, one being that I'm three hours away from my new husband (we've been married 27 days today, with no honeymoon and we are still unpacking into our new home).  The other factor, however, has little to do with the program itself and more to do with how I feel about myself, in relation to my peers, in the program. You see, I am a direct product of the MTC because I was raised in the very spot that this program targets having the greatest need for educational reform in MS: the MS Delta.  Two of the best teacher's I've ever had (Mrs. Pelli-Leonard and Mr. Chris Wilkens) helped me to alter my method of thinking so that I would not be destined to the horrifying fate that was already expected of me.  In fact, as I was formulating my lesson plan earlier today, I kept pretending I was Mrs. Pelli (at that time), making sure I had all my "i's" dotted and "t's" crossed.  So what's the problem, you ask?  My irritation stems from my realization of the fact that there are few people like these great teachers.  Being a Black woman, I was almost guaranteed to be a pregnant highschool dropout.  And those two teachers saw what everyone else considered the norm for my "kind" and stirred it so viciously that we had no other choice but to create our own versions of our lives.  I was one of the lucky ones, I guess, because I had teachers who actually cared about me.  So, I ask that my peers really consider the impact that they plan to have on their students' lives, because most of the time YOU have to wish their dreams into reality.  Believe me, you will be entering a world where it's almost frowned upon to want to do better for yourself.  And if you, as a teacher, already think that your students don't stand a chance, they will see it.  And they will believe it.  So dream a little for them!

Oh, and I don't have any questions :)